Interview With Myself

On April 10th 1970, Paul McCartney issued a press release to tell the world that The Beatles were breaking up. The press release was in the form of an interview with McCartney in which a journalist asked Paul questions about the break up of the group, and McCartney’s plans to become a solo artist.

Years later, it came to light that this “interview” was not an interview at all, but that McCartney had written the entire press release himself – both the fictitious interviewer’s questions and Paul’s answers to those questions. There was a great deal of friction between McCartney and John Lennon at the time, and also bad blood between McCartney and George Harrison.

Both Lennon and Harrison, as well as Ringo Starr, felt like McCartney was trying to dominate the group and become the front man and real star of The Beatles, while reducing the other three members of the group to lesser roles as his sidemen.

In 1968 and 1969, both Lennon and Harrison, on different occasions, had walked out of recording sessions while angrily expressing that they were quitting the band. But after calming down, both Lennon and Harrison each returned, and without saying anything about these incidents in public.

But when McCartney decided to leave The Beatles, his approach was to go public with his press release in the form of the fake interview, as a way to blindside both Lennon and Harrison, who both knew nothing about McCartney’s intentions to leave the band, until Paul’s press release went public.

But here’s where I stop talking about the break up of The Beatles, because that is not what this post is about.

I was just letting my readers know where I got my idea for this post, in which I’m going to conduct an interview with myself. But unlike Paul McCartney in 1970, I’m not creating a false scenario to screw over my friends and business partners in public. In the “interview” that follows, the interviewer asking the questions will be Myself. The person answering the questions will be Me.

Myself: So Chris, why are you doing this? What’s this all about?

Me: Well, tomorrow on July 27th, is a very special day for my wife and I. It’s the 22nd Anniversary of our marriage, and I want to give my wife a gift that I know she will genuinely appreciate, and more so than anything else I could give her.

Myself: Well congratulations! That IS a very special day! So what are you going to give your wife, that as you just said, is better than anything else you could give her?

Me: I’m leaving WordPress.

Myself: Really? You are leaving WordPress? Are you leaving WordPress permanently? And what does leaving WordPress have to do with this very special gift to your wife for your 22nd anniversary?

Me: Yes, I’m really leaving WordPress – but not permanently. I’ll be back after Labor Day in September. And taking over a month off from WordPress is the gift that I was referring to, when I said that my wife will appreciate this gift more than anything else I could give her.

Myself: But why would the fact that you are taking over a month off from WordPress be a gift that your wife will appreciate so much? Has your involvement with WordPress been causing trouble between you and your wife? Does your wife read your blog? And if so, what kind of trouble is this creating? Is it the often humorous but sexually racy content in many of your posts? And you can be quite a flirt with some of your female readers at times. Is that what is upsetting her?

Me: Well, yes, it is true that my involvement with WordPress has been causing trouble between Jean and I, and she does read my blog frequently. But the sexually risque content of my posts, or me flirting with my female readers is not what is bothering her. Jean has known me since August 2nd of 1987, so she’s known me for almost 25 years now, and she knows me better than anyone else in my entire life.

Which is why she knows that I love doing humor with sexually risque and even sexually graphic content, and she also knows that I do it only for the sake of humor, and for the sake of making people laugh.

Myself: But what about the flirting with some of your female readers? Are you sure that’s not what is bothering her?

Me: Nope, it has nothing to do with the flirting. Again, Jean knows me better than anyone else, and she also knows that I enjoy flirting with the opposite sex. But she also knows that my flirting is harmless, without any intention of taking it any further than just kidding around with my online female friends, whom I have no contact with in real life, but only online. She understands that it’s harmless and she is not threatened by it at all.

Myself: Well, then what IS bothering your wife about you and WordPress?

Me: Jean feels like I spend too much of my free time on WordPress, and to the point that I’m spending far less time with her, when she and I both have free time available to be with each other, and enjoy each other’s company. And honestly? I know that she is right. She has a valid reason to be upset, and because I really do love her, I don’t want her to be upset because she feels like a WordPress widow.

Myself: That does make sense that feeling like she’s become a WordPress widow, would really bother your wife. But now I do have to ask you a personal question here. I am very familiar with your blog and your posts, and there have been a few times when you have written very openly about very intimate details of your love life with your wife. Here are some examples:

Joyously Intimate Revelation

In which you write a vivid description of your wife standing in front of you in the nude.

VALENTINEORAMA DRAMA!!!

In which you describe you and your wife having make up sex after having a fight.

The “Anything is Possible!” Post

In which you write about your wife modeling clothes for you, while she is either topless or nude below the waist, and then how both of you had sex afterwards.

You’re Magic

In which you again write a vivid description of you and your wife making love.

The content in these posts is deeply personal and very intimate, and what you so vividly write about, is about her. And you are telling us that she has read these posts, and it’s not a problem for her? It’s not a problem for her that you have posted them on your blog, where anyone can read them??? Can you honestly say that none of this embarrasses or upsets her, and she doesn’t get very angry with you for doing it?

Me: Well, with all respect to you, you have just demonstrated how the media takes content out of a much larger context and reduces it to just a few seconds in a soundbite or just one sentence, which can be very misleading and give people a very distorted perception of the true nature of an author’s writing, when they don’t get the chance read the complete work, or in this case, the entire post.

As a result there is controversy and anger where there really isn’t a reason for any controversy and anger.

Your first example is your most completely described example, with “Joyously Intimate Revelation” but your one sentence description is still incomplete. The truth is that when my wife read it, her initial reaction was embarrassment. So I immediately offered to delete it. Her immediate reply was “No, leave it up.” Why? Because it was a very flattering description of her body, and my love and admiration for her was written into every single word, and she could feel that.

And just for the record, if there is ever a time that I write anything and post it, and it upsets my wife when she reads it, I will delete it immediately. But after writing well over 100 posts, that has never happened.

Your one sentence description of your second example, VALENTINORAMA DRAMA!!! is the most misleading of all, and it’s like describing what kind of man Abraham Lincoln was, by showing people a picture of his skeleton – yeah, the guy was really tall… It’s true, but it’s true in such a ridiculously incomplete way, that it reveals virtually nothing about who Abraham Lincoln was, and all that he accomplished in his life.

You describe this post by saying it describes me and my wife having make up sex after having a fight. Yeah, and judging from his bones, Abe Lincoln was really tall… But anyone who actually reads this post, will know that it has this sentence in it:

There was that perfect flowing dance of partners who have danced together for years, and then the inevitable and wonderful rush of reaching the heights together again, as we were one flesh, one soul, intimately bonded both physically and spiritually, and loving each other more than we love our own lives.”

I think that my single sentence is a much better description than your single sentence is.

I won’t even bother with defending the last two posts, because they need no defense. I’ll only add that anything I have ever written in this blog about my wife and my relationship with my wife, however intimate and personal, has been written with the utmost of respect for her, and written as a proclamation of my life long love for her. And she not only knows this, she can feel it from deep within her very heart and soul. So yes, she has read these posts, and she loves me all the more for writing them. And no, she doesn’t have a problem with them.

In fact, when she read “You’re Magic” she was moved to tears, and she told me that since it was about her, and how I truly felt about her, it is the most beautiful writing she has ever read in all her life.

Do you any more relevant questions for me now? Or are you going to keep going around in stupid and ridiculous circles about sex and jealousy, when neither has anything to do with me taking over a month off from WordPress to make my wife happy?

Myself: Well I’m sorry Chris, but my intention was not to offend you, and I am sorry that you seem to have taken it that way, but you have made some good points and let’s move on to another more relevant question now.

If your wife is unhappy about WordPress taking away the quality time that you and she have to spend together, what is going to change over a month from now, after Labor Day, when you return to WordPress? Why won’t the same pattern repeat itself again, and cause the same problems for you and your wife?

Me: Now that is a relevant question, and a very good question. My answer is that during the time that I’m away from WordPress, not only will I be spending more quality time with my wife to make her happy, instead of feeling like a WordPress widow – but I’ll also be practicing on a daily basis, techniques to improve my ability to possess a greater and stronger level of self discipline.

The goal is for me to no longer be obsessed with WordPress, to the point that I’m neglecting the needs of my wife for love, fun, friendship, companionship, and more emotional support from me. Because she deserves all of that from me, and so much more.

Myself: What are these techniques that you will practice, to improve and strengthen your self discipline? And what will you do, if when after you return to WordPress in September, you find that you still have the same problems between you and your wife, over the amount of time you spend on WordPress?

Me: Well, since it’s now dinner time here at our house, I’m spending too much time on WordPress right now. So I’ll answer your first question about the techniques when I come back to WordPress after Labor Day in September. But I’ll answer your second question right now – I’ll do whatever is necessary to solve these problems once and for all, because my wife deserves nothing less than that from me.

Myself: One last question. Do you have anything to say to your readers and fellow bloggers before you leave?

Me: Yes. Thanks so much to each and every one of you, for taking the time to read my posts, and to care enough to comment on my posts. I do sincerely and genuinely appreciate your support, as well as your online friendship and companionship. And to the WP bloggers that I read and admire most, and you know who you are, thanks so much for all the humor and entertainment, and all the information, education, and social consciousness raising, as well as some excellent photography.

And thanks for teaching me how to be a better writer, by leading with your own example, with your own skillfully written posts.

Have a great rest of your summer everyone, and I’ll see you again in September!

 

About Chris Sheridan

I’m a 56 year old guy who is young (and immature) at heart, and I love humor and laughter. Married for 22 years, but still enjoy all the glories of womanhood everywhere, even while dedicated to one woman only - and I hope my wife never finds out about her!
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8 Responses to Interview With Myself

  1. greatmartin says:

    Yes, but does Jean know about me??????????????????????????????

  2. Elyse says:

    Have a wonderful well deserved break, both of you.

    And I had never heard that story about the Beatles break up. I bet they’d still be together if Paul had had a different interviewer ;)

    • Thank you very much, for both our sakes, Elyse.

      It was a long time ago, but I thought that was a pretty underhanded and ugly thing for McCartney to do.

      Thanks again for stopping by, and I hope you and yours really enjoy the rest of your summer. I’ll see you again in September! :-)

  3. Summer says:

    I hear ya! I’ve been taking an extended summer break myself. Cleveland summers are short – gotta enjoy ‘em while they last! Have a great rest of summer.

    • Thanks Summer. I guess that making it more likely that my wife and I will enjoy the rest of our summer together is one of the reasons I need to take this break from WP. Thanks for stopping by and commenting, and I hope that you have a great rest of your summer as well.

  4. RFL says:

    While there are many that will miss you, (I will miss you!) I think this is a wonderful gift for your wife, and it’s clear you have given it a lot of thought. I hope you enjoy your time off and come back with more great stories and a stronger bond with the love of your life :) Since I know Jean enjoys football as much as you do, I won’t warn you not to replace WP with football, and make her an NFL Widow. See ya on the other side, Chris!

    • I didn’t want to not reply to your comment here, Rachelle, so even though I’m technically not supposed to be on WordPress, I am right now, but I know that my wife won’t mind, because right now I am taking care of my Dad, who suffers from advanced dementia.

      While I don’t know if many will miss me, I do know that there are many here on WP whom I will really miss, and you are near the top of the list of people I will miss the most.

      I really didn’t want to take this six week leave of absense from WordPress, and I’m still struggling with it. But the fact remains that my involvement with WordPress has become an obsession, and this is hurting my wife. She is the last person who deserves it, and I just had to face reality and do whatever is required to make WordPress no longer a problem for our relationship, and a source of unhappiness for my wife.

      But we did have both a wonderful day and night for our Wedding Anniversary, and later today, our celebration will continue for the rest of this weekend. Given enough love and attention, my wife will give it back twice over, because she is a truly wonderful person. So I am optimistic that the six weeks I’m away from WordPress will ultimately make us both much happier, as well as resulting in a stronger bond in our love for each other.

      Thank you so much for your comment, Rachelle, and for all the companionship and support you have given me as well, since we found each other’s blogs. And God willing, I’ll see you in September! :-)

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